It wasn’t until the past few years that I knew what gender-neutral language was. When I was younger, everything was split and labeled by the gender binary. We either had a mailman or a mail-lady, not a postal person. People had a boyfriend or a girlfriend, not a partner. I was in the military for… Continue reading Using Gender-Neutral Language
There was so much I didn’t know the day I learned my son was transgender. In addition to not understanding what the word transgender meant, I didn’t know what it meant for my son. Because I learned Leo is transgender from a social media post, I had a lot of time to overthink what that… Continue reading Your Transgender Child is Not a Different Person
Guest post by Leo Richardson It is my pleasure to introduce you to people whose lived experiences will help you better understand what it is like to be transgender. Each year on March 31, we observe International Transgender Day of Visibility (TDOV). The purpose is to celebrate transgender, non-binary, and gender-nonconforming people worldwide. Founded in 2009, the… Continue reading Guest Post: Transgender Day of Visibility (TDOV).
When my son Leo came out as transgender, I was blindsided by his news. Because I didn’t know that he had been hiding his true gender since middle school, I felt it came out of nowhere. I went to bed thinking I had a daughter, and the next day I woke up and had a… Continue reading Let Go Of the Guilt
I remember the day my therapist told me the feeling I was experiencing was grief. It was a few months after Leo came out, and I was staring out her office window watching it snow. The compassion on her face made me cry in those early days, so I would take a break from looking… Continue reading Your Grief Is Not About Your Child Being Transgender
In the days after my son Leo came out as transgender, I wasn’t sure who I could talk to about how I was feeling. Part of it was because I didn’t know if my feelings were okay. The other part was more complicated. I didn’t want anyone to misinterpret my emotions as a lack of… Continue reading Who Can You Talk To About Your Child?
My son came out as transgender in a Facebook post six years ago. During the hours of that cold January day, I spent a lot of time on Google. I searched for answers to questions and looked up words I didn’t understand. It did nothing to make me feel better. If anything, all that searching… Continue reading So, Your Child is Transgender. Now What?
For the second year in a row, the most-read post on this website is “You Can Grieve and Support Your Child.” This year, it has almost 4,000 views. When I wrote it in the fall of 2019, it was in response to a New York Times article that said parents who grieve after their child… Continue reading Support for Ourselves So We Can Support Our Child
When I became a parent, I worked hard to remain true to who I was. I engaged in hobbies and maintained friendships, and even went back to school at the age of thirty-nine. I knew that there would be a transitional period when my children left home as I adjusted to not being a full-time… Continue reading When You Feel Like You’ve Lost Yourself
When my oldest child Ember first came out as gay in high school (they are bisexual), I was still a member of the Catholic Church. At the time, I was starting to question where the church stood on issues such as women in leadership roles, support for LGBTQ and divorced members, as well as several… Continue reading You Are Allowed to Change Your Mind