It’s the holiday season. If you are like me, you have personalized ornaments and stockings in your storage bins waiting to be hung up. But, what do you do with personalized items when your child comes out as transgender? How do you navigate the holiday season when there are so many decisions to make? What… Continue reading What to Do With Personalized Items
As parents, we all have a collection of items from when our children were babies through their childhood. Maybe you have a favorite blanket or stuffed animal. Perhaps some baby outfits or the first pair of shoes. There might be art projects and school awards. Then, when our children are grown, we have something to… Continue reading Creating a Memory Box
The year Leo told us he was transgender, I skipped gathering with our extended family for the holidays. It wasn’t that I was trying to avoid them; I was overcome by grief. My Grampa died that year, and it compounded the grief I felt around losing the idea of having a daughter. I didn’t have… Continue reading Make Space for Grief This Holiday Season
October 20 is International Pronouns Day. It’s a day to commit to learning about and sharing your pronouns. Before my son Leo came out as transgender, I never gave a single thought to my own or anyone else’s pronouns. It never occurred to me that people would have pronouns that didn’t match the gender they… Continue reading Sharing Your Pronouns is an Invitation
October 11 is National Coming Out Day, and many LGBTQ+ folks use this opportunity as a chance to come out to the people they love. When my son Leo came out as transgender, it was through a Facebook post that I read shortly after waking on a Saturday morning. I was so overwhelmed by all… Continue reading Your Child Just Came Out. Now What?
When my oldest child Ember first came out as gay in high school (they are bisexual), I was still a member of the Catholic Church. At the time, I was starting to question where the church stood on issues such as women in leadership roles, support for LGBTQ and divorced members, as well as several… Continue reading You Are Allowed to Change Your Mind
Transgender Children and Youth: Cultivating Pride and Joy with Families in Transition is the all-in-one guide parents of transgender children need. It covers essential issues transgender children and their families face. The book covers foundational topics such as basic terms and vocabulary and what it means to be transgender. There is a whole chapter on… Continue reading Review: Transgender Children and Youth by Elijah C. Nealy
During the first year after my son Leo came out as transgender, I told my therapist I had never been more lonely in my life. During crises and tragedies, people often close ranks around one another. They offer support and comfort. When a child comes out as transgender, however, it’s different. No one knows what… Continue reading Being the Parent of a Transgender Child is Lonely
The second worst day of my life was the day I found out my oldest child was suicidal. The next day, we sat in a therapist’s office and discussed the next steps and how to keep our child safe. And none of it felt like enough. Eleven years later, it still doesn’t feel like enough.… Continue reading Creating an Emergency Action Plan for Your Child
When my son Leo was in middle school, he was diagnosed with food allergies. As a teenager with new allergies to peanuts, tree nuts, and soy, this automatically labeled him “other.” He became “that kid,” the reason students in his classes couldn’t eat lunch during academic periods or bring contraband snacks or treats to celebrate… Continue reading Do We Tell Our Child’s Teacher They Are Transgender?